the music of vibrators

Tags

, , , , , , , ,

Listen. That’s the music of vibrators
at the end of the day. Not all of us
get to be filthy buggered mess makers.
Some of us are cleaners. Some are loveless.
Some sleep alone. That’s why other people’s
sex lives are a drag. If it’s not bragging
then it’s resentment. If it’s not facials
then it’s “Master, may I?” That’s hell, fucking
hell. Give me widows, the lonely, the shy.
Give me all who are neglected and numb,
blind, on fire. All who crave but have no one
to turn to. Every night some of us cry
in our sleep. Some lick sticky fingers. Some
fill the whole world with their dreams of passion.

half-alive in us

Tags

, , , , , , ,

Perhaps we are not real; the way the ghost
in the machine is not really dead, death
being more haunting than haunted. Stoned, dosed,
zonked, I love escape; each night my soul’s breath
escapes my lungs, filling me with aching,
with awe, a long dead girl in the empire
of her knowledge, laughing when the living
bemoan about the death of desire,
as if lust can be half-alive in us.
What’s real when we’re stoned, liquefied, reduced
to the rude fluids of our souls? What’s real
is when we thrust and grunt and moan, oneness
being found in cumming, in the unloosed
orgasm that’s the gods’ gate in our skull.

you with words

Tags

, , , , , ,

portray I have the valley of your flesh
before me here be dragons but my mouth
won’t stop there if words can cause you gooseflesh
shivers, draw shooting stars down, travel south
from nape and neck to collar bone, lower
beyond ribs, to the belly where the laugh
sleeps, the gasp, the path that your ghost lover
once took. I will mark you well. words are half
physical, half divine. like flesh. we bruise
into crop circles. my tongue in your hair
I will call forth your milky way, I will
spill the heavens across your thighs. infuse
you with words, rare ones like clit, cum and prayer,
common ones like laugh, dance and daffodil.

nothing like yours

Tags

, , , , , , , , ,

The last summer moon stalks the woods; satyr
girl-parts, cast in shadows. In the small night
dogs bark, Dark I cannot sleep. The fine fur
on your legs tickles my neck. This delight
only takes me so far, moon, Moon, your goat
legs crouch over me. Slowly the light melts,
my face runs, night-noises thrum in my throat,
a tune, a late summer breeze leaving welts,
love bites, sticky cum, all over. But who
am I to the night? I nurse the dying.
I am there when they pass. Now my nocturne,
goat girl, is nothing like yours. I miss you.
Once there was the rude fuck, deep dream, godling,
before death, all we ever did was burn.

note:
I’m a hospice nurse aide, which means I spend most my nights at the bedside of dying people, usually patients who don’t have families or friends to be with them. The downside of working nights is that it screws up my ability to sleep like normal people and without sleep how can one dream? The Dalai Lama said that sleep is the best meditation. No wonder all my thoughts run like crooked little paths.

pervert moon

Tags

, , , , , , , ,

Some say love, some fucking. I say desert
rain, I say saguaro, I say mesquite.
All those pent-up scents under our pervert
moon, the moon’s spawn full of heat, like my heat,
once trapped, frustrated, now rising. Fever
dreams that only rain can release. So fuck,
it is love after all when your lover
turns your dirt to mud. When all that we suck
and lick blooms, when the words for need and lust
become orphic, the air filled with balsam
and pine, filled with mesquite and saguaro.
Sanctify this fucking love, we who must
go for so long without a drop, we’ll cum,
cloudburst, a flash flood in an arroyo.

the thin edge of sin

Tags

, , , , , ,

Odd. I write about ghosts lovers, you say,
“don’t get carried away.” I write about
the weight of a rifle, though, its blue-gray
metal, its stock sticking bolt, all the doubt
I had in hitting the man over there,
trouble of loading while on the run, shock
of noise, recoil; you grin. You love warfare,
warcraft, the way I love a dead boy’s cock,
a dead sister’s clit. You, who will never
burden yourself with another’s life blood,
mock this: sex is sin. War? Necessity.
Thank you, but I’ll stick with my ghost lover,
the one whose been to hell and back naked;
who knows about love and death equally.

drone on

Tags

, , , , , , , ,

No eye melted can see again: Dresden
fire rain a storm leaf fixed to a girl’s clinched
palm, held up against the sky. And again
bombs drop, drones in the mountains, a girl’s pinched
face turned. How many sisters have I lost?
daughters? mothers? aunts? ——Tell me, leaf of flame,
tell me names, faces. ——In the holocaust
to come, who’ll remember this face, this name?
No one. I shall huddle with my sisters.
Machines will drop fire on us. ——Do you hear
me? Drones will drop fire and you’ll be smitten,
or you’ll write about how all us lovers
are low dirty dogs. How the thing you fear
the most is the pain of rejection.