danube

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Just say, “scummy waves;” that’s the sort of kiss
I want. Something so foul that it sucks down

seagulls in its wake. There’s a dead princess
who claims she’s a Czarina. Her pocked gown

looks a tad Orthodox. We made out, once,
though it felt like deep-throating an ice cube.

That cold got everywhere. There’s a science
to it, like when I swam in the Danube;

something pulled both my legs wide. I could feel
each wave lapping. Everything should lap, dog.

And the puckering … and the — tie my tubes,
lip gloss. If you want this, make it surreal.

Like the dead who kiss since they’re only fog,
or the living with fondness for ice cubes.

with flutes and fleas and dung

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Pick me clean. Strung up I’ll never go down
on my best friend. Never gape or have her

sodden laundry slap my face. All these nouns
define me. I am more girlie-satyr

than twin cocked-minotaur; with flute and fleas
and dung between my hooves. I know the more

that I write today the less I will please.
I hate being someone’s gear-notch; hardcore

engine-grind. I shift. I shaft. Stranger’s love
poems bore me. So what? They still won’t

dig graves or change diapers. Hush. There’s a hill.
(there is always a hill) with birds above

where I sit and do satyrie-shit. Don’t
it just cut ya? like bones in a gristmill.

and then that happened

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I yawn. I wake. I walk about bandy
legged without you staring at my scarred-up

leg or the tiger-stripes on my belly.
The crows bring hashish, vervain and julep

root to my window. The ants bring badger’s
foot. It’s good to be alone. All the toys

are put away. The urge to peg strangers
has dulled. I’ve wiped the lipstick off. This bruise

will fade in spring-light; so will all this tensed
rage. I don’t need sap to run with mischief

in my head. I’ve sharpened all the kitchen
knives. The shadows rub their muzzles against

my palm. I’m so full of myself; enough
to know I’m both antidote and toxin.

scars without flinching

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“Ugly,” is what you would call me, if you
were to call me anything. I have one

who can touch the scars without flinching. True,
“I am lucky;” what they tell the burden

so it will stop feeling like one. Sometimes
I want you to see what I look naked.

Mostly I don’t. It’s not like the right rhyme
will make the world love me, or that my blood,

once spilled, would raise a Cain. Of all the shocks
that’s the worse. That all my fears get condensed

to this: I could go out, full of desire
through the rain, with crickets clinging to stalks;

through wind, with seas of Queen Anne’s Lace against
my knees; and I would still drown in such fire.

you see the merchandise

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Carve me a toothpick; I have one curled hair
stuck in-between my incisors. These chapped

hips, this silicon knob with its horsehair
tail, these boots. Have I ridden you? or “tapped

your ass,” as Butch Lisette once claimed? Of course
not. Please forgive my friends, they are … so young,

obsessed with sending nude selfies. They’re coarse
little things, amusements. But you? Your tongue

itches to taste this, no? Peace. Come closely.
Pull up your trousers. Look out the window.

Be still, pet. What do you see? The merchandise
of lust; the night hums with it. But for me

I’m done with stroking needy libidos.
That’s how much I adore you: more than vice.

cuts you up

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[I have] [no] [words for] [this flesh I] [just wish]
[the whole] [world was flooded] [hip] [deep I do]

[fear] [that] [I’ll wake] [under water that] [squish]
[sound when] [I move my] [thighs, some] [membrane-goo]

[that I] [can’t pull] [off; Venus] [in the sky]
[There should be a] [photo] [I’d share my] [rude]

[crotch, my wiry hair] [my scars my] [marked] [thigh]
[I love] [my] [thigh but there] [isn’t. Rough-hewed]

[flesh is not] [fit for such] [things I love] [how]
[both] [legs look under] [water, yet] [water]

[floods in] [when I] [open] [my mouth] [Venus]
[if you would just] [possess me] [once more] [Now]

[liquid] [laps. My] [limbs curl] [in] [I’m the] [slur]
[without words] [What] [Burroughs called the virus]

check your tongue

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Of my three aunts, Sylvia, Adrienne
and Anne, two killed themselves and one refused

to look at me. I’ve loved them. I’ve loved gin,
static-buzz, bone-fever — all that confused

their words with being something more. “Nomen
est omen:”
call me, “Left Behind.” Call her:

“Matertera.” Without these three women
what am I? Check your tongue about that slur

that I’ve broken my pact made between gods
and their dire verse; as if either pleased.

Tonight I want an aunt’s voice that marauds
through my skull, that translates all that buzzed

into something. Confessions. I love them.
I love their words. Their so-called hate and sin.

omit

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“Suckle my flesh.” There should be more, of course,
something about, “your kisses on my clit,”

“your two fingers inside,” and “my voice, hoarse,
urgent,” “my flesh sweating, flushed.” I omit

the rest because this isn’t about that.
Somewhere a girl sleeps on flagstones, under

thatch-roof and dry-stone walls. A witch’s brat
who knows nothing about lust, that other

magic. No, not even that. So, what then?
Quote from the Torah, Bible or Koran

about female nature being sinful?
Hell no! We go down to the beach, again,

naked breasts wearing shadows of a tan,
watching waves rush in and out like a bull.

huli jing [act iii]

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HULI JING: the 9-tailed fox

[a reworking of Giraudoux’s Ondine]

ACT III

Huli Jing, a 9-tailed fox-spirit.
Jinggu, a Wu-Shaman.
Niu and Qui (Huli Jing’s human parents)
Four 9-Tailed Fox-Spirits(in their true form)

][][

Nighttime in a roadside inn
somewhere in mythological China.
All the characters are in the exact
same places as before.

JINGGU
Huli Jing!

[Jinggu runs out into the rain to look for him.]

NIU [sheepishly]
Well …

QUI [sadly]
Here’s another nice mess we’ve gotten ourselves into.

NIU
I think I’d better tell her everything, don’t you?

QUI
Yes, I think you’d better.

[Jinggu returns, dripping.]

NIU
You’re all wet.

JINGGU
He’s not your son, is he?

QUI
No, madam.

NIU
We had a son, madam, once. But – but he was stolen when he was only six months old.

JINGGU
Who left Huli Jing with you, then?

NIU
We found him, madam, deep in the woods, sleeping between the roots of a tree.

JINGGU
I find that hard to believe. Usually these sorts of things only happen in fairy tales, of the cheaper variety.

QUI
And yet it happened on the very day that we lost our baby. And the mystery has never been solved.

JINGGU [off in her own world]
I’m told that most women go and find a match-maker to arrange these sorts of things, but since I don’t see one lurking in the shadows just now, if Huli Jing calls you mother and father then I would like you to be my in-laws when I marry him!

NIU [horrified]
But … but my lady, are you thinking clearly?

JINGGU
I know, I know. “Traditions must be observed,” and all that nonsense. I’m sure that you think a bold – yet charmingly pretty – wu-shaman of the Court, such as myself, might make an unsuitable daughter-in-law for you, especially in your doddering old age –

QUI [interrupting]
Madam hasn’t drunken too much wine, has she?

NIU [aside]
No, no, it can’t be the wine. Fermented yak spit isn’t that alcoholic!

JINGGU
I’ve never thought more clearly than now – wait, did you just say “yak spit”? Odd, I thought it tasted familiar. Anyway, where was I?

NIU
For once I do not remember what madam was attempting to say.

QUI [helpfully]
Something about marrying our spooky, under-age son?

JINGGU
Indeed! Thank you, father-in-law! I ask you for Huli Jing’s hand, and it’s his hand I’m thinking of, no one else’s. I want that hand to lead me to Court, to bed, even to death.

NIU [trying to be tactful]
One can’t have two beaus, though, madam. You can’t take that many men to bed.

JINGGU [laughing]
Well, there isn’t a law about it yet – [Suddenly realizing what she has just said.] O, damn, I guess there is. Boy, do I hate Confucianism. Anyway, who else are you thinking about?

NIU
Um, Lord Tsu Tia-Chua, my lady?

JINGGU [perking up]
O! Do you know Tsu Tia-Chua, too? What a stroke of luck! Well, obviously, if we both know about that man’s many failures then you can understand exactly why I need to marry Huli Jing!

NIU
But … your ladyship has spent time telling us how perfect he is.

JINGGU
Ah, a passing whim. Yes, yes, I might have gone on about him, and apart from his dreadful posture and a slight tendency to froth at the mouth I’m sure any country yokel would think that he is indeed perfect.

QUI [a bit scandalized]
Madam!

NIU
But my lady, it’s wrong!

JINGGU
Wrong? Look here, Innkeeper Niu, so-called mother-in-law, just answer me a plain question. Once upon a time there was a shaman who set out to look for the one thing in this world that wasn’t stale, flat and unprofitable. Suddenly, in the deep, dark woods she met a boy called Huli Jing. He pulled curious mirrors from the thin air. He tasted her essence and not only was he the most beautiful boy that she had ever seen in her life, but she felt that he was everything gay and sentimental and courageous. She felt that he could do things for her that no other man ever could, talk to the animals, just imagine it, or fly like one of those winged squirrel-things, or climb the tallest tree to pull celestial daisy-chains down from the heavens – I’ve always wanted one of those. And … having seen and felt all that, she bowed deeply to tradition and rode off home to marry a pot-bellied, sour-mouthed crank called Tsu Tia-Chua? Now, tell me, what is that shaman’s name?

NIU
That’s not exactly fair.

JINGGU
I asked you a question. The whole world would consider her an idiot, wouldn’t they?

QUI
But madam, you’re engaged already.

JINGGU
My dear Qui, you don’t seriously imagine that I’d ever marry Tsu Tia-Chua now that I know Huli Jing? Everyday there are brides who wake up after their wedding night loathing the hayseed boy who just took their most precious-precious – wait, isn’t it odd that we’re still calling virginity “precious,” yes?

NIU
My lady, next you’ll be saying that “binding girl’s feet so that they can’t walk” is odd as well.

JINGGU
Pfff. These new fads will never last.

QUI [nudging]
Niu, tell madam!

JINGGU
Yes, please do! If you have any just cause why I won’t make the most loveliest of daughter-in-laws for you, let me hear it!

NIU
Er, my lady, you say that you want to marry our child, Huli Jing. It’s, um, a great honor for us, but, you see, we can’t give you what – what isn’t ours. [To Qui.] That was good, wasn’t it?

QUI
Rather.

JINGGU
Then you must know who his parents are!

NIU
Well, madam, there’s no question of genitor, that’s the whole trouble with Huli Jing. If we hadn’t adopted him, he’d have found someway to live and grow up just the same. He’s never needed our hugs and kisses, and besides, once the trees start moaning you can’t keep him in the house. I don’t know, I suppose wild spirits have a sort of understanding with Nature, you know, by instinct, or maybe Huli Jing’s own blood is bound up in all this great, green horror that’s outside, somehow. But there’s powers about that boy, no doubt of it!

JINGGU [unsure]
So … I must go and ask if Nature will object to me marrying Huli Jing? But Nature didn’t object to your adopting him. Why all this coyness?

QUI
Coyness? We don’t keep him on a leash and chain, madam.

NIU
We don’t even know if he’ll ever come back once he’s had a tandy. Plenty of times he’s disappeared, and we’ve thought we’d never see him again; we’ve looked everywhere, there’s not been a trace of him. He’s never wanted any other clothes, any toys or anything; so when he goes, he leaves nothing behind. It’s as if he’d never been here in the first place – as if we’d dreamed of him. That’s all he is, a dream. There’s no Huli Jing, really. [To Qui.] Do you believe in him, father?

QUI
I believe you’re starting to talk nonsense, mother. Our son is a bit odd, but he’s still our son, with the Forest’s blessing, of course.

JINGGU
Let’s forget it, shall we? About Huli Jing – I’m beginning to wonder myself – perhaps you’re right. I’m in a dream like yourselves.

NIU [as if mesmerized]
Of course, I remember seeing him, all right, our little Huli Jing! I remember his voice and the way he laughed, I can still see him throwing your rabbit out the window, a good half-pound of bunny; but I won’t be surprised if he never comes back now, not with someone hungry for him and all we see of the scamp will be a few little forest storms and queer little twigs, and his only signs of affection will be in the leaves scraping against the window on nights like tonight …

QUI
Please forgive us, madam. The yak spit has gone to my wife’s head!

NIU
Head? Pfff, if only! It was the night that we lost him – the night that we found him. The build-up. The bursting moment. My eyelids quivered –

QUI
I think we ought to go to bed now, madam, if you don’t mind!

NIU
And the moaning! The trees keep moaning, night and day!

QUI
Er, she’s tired out, that’s her trouble. Come along, now, mother-dear! We’ll talk about Huli Jing tomorrow.

NIU
Ah, if only he comes back!

[Niu and Qui exit.]

JINGGU [looking about the dark room]
Well, whether he does or not, I’m going to wait.

[Jinggu settles back in the chair by the fire. Slowly the back wall of the inn becomes transparent, forming an invisible screen, and the first 9-Tailed Fox appears.]

9-TAILED FOX #1
Shaman, mama shaman, take me!

JINGGU [startled]
What?

9-TAILED FOX #1 [pressing itself up against the screen]
Kiss me!

JINGGU
I beg your pardon?

9-TAILED FOX #1
Kiss me, mama shaman!

JINGGU
Kiss you? For all the celestial powers, why?

9-TAILED FOX #1 [beginning to undress]
Shall I come to you naked, mother?

JINGGU
Do whatever you want; it’s none of my affair.

9-TAILED FOX #1
Do you want me on top of you, or should I take you from behind?

[Huli Jing appears through the door, waving away the Fox-Spirit as if it were smoke.]

HULI JING [highly irritated]
O, you’re so stupid! If you knew how silly you looked!

[9-TAILED FOX #1 disappears.]

JINGGU [jumping up and taking Huli Jing in her arms]
My darling Huli Jing! What is going on?

HULI JING
O, it’s one of those jealous neighbors I told you about. They can’t bear you loving me so they’re trying to steal you away. They’re saying that anything other-worldly can seduce you.

JINGGU
I don’t know about other worlds, I like the one we’re in now —

[9-TAILED FOX #2 appears, splaying out its legs and lifting up its robes to its knees.]

9-TAILED FOX #2
Don’t force my legs open! Don’t touch me!

JINGGU [completely aghast]
Is it a demon? What is it talking about?

9-TAILED FOX #2
Don’t touch me, mama shaman! I’m not that sort of toy.

JINGGU
Toy? Are all your neighbors slightly deranged?

HULI JING
They think that if seduction fails, the quickest way is playing innocent. They say mortals all fall for the same tricks.

9-TAILED FOX #2
Don’t put your mouth down there, mama shaman! Don’t stroke my thighs!

JINGGU
I don’t really understand what’s going on. Why would anyone stand outside your window and make lewd comments like that at this time of night?

HULI JING
Why, indeed? O Jinggu, darling Jinggu, never let go of me. Look at that silly fool! — All right, you’ve lost too! You can go now!

[9-TAILED FOX #2 vanishes and 9-TAILED FOX #3 rises up to take its place.]

JINGGU
Great googly moogly, another one!

HULI JING
O, no, this is getting boring! Only two are supposed to come at a time!

JINGGU
Let it stay. It seems to want to say something.

HULI JING
No, make it go away! It’s the Song of the Fox Lovers. No mortal can resist it. O, please …

JINGGU [indulgently]
Go on, wild thing from the wild woods.

9-TAILED FOX #3 [singing]
Mortal of breast and bone,
Do you not find what you see
Gorgeous? Both fore and aft,
In face and form? This I offer
To you … I offer to you …

HULI JING
O, very nice. Splendid.

JINGGU
What do you mean, “splendid?”

HULI JING
You know — childish seduction. Surely, your mountain demons have tempted you with far more?

JINGGU [scratching head]
Well, perhaps, but they were demons — oh, here’s the another one.

[9-TAILED FOX #4 appears next to 9-TAILED FOX #3.]

9-TAILED FOX #4 [singing]
Mortals are wicked,
All the forest know,
And they praise too well
And curse too freely.
And you, Jinggu, mother,
Do you really want a beast
Between your minor arcana
And labia majora?

HULI JING
Have you quite finished?

JINGGU
I don’t know why you’re getting upset, your neighbors in these parts seem to know an awful lot of folk-songs. If they’re going to this much trouble to give us a performance we might as well have the good manners as to listen.

HULI JING
But my kinfolk do this every time one of us falls in love with a mortal. I think it’s part of the small print in the contract.

JINGGU
Really, Huli Jing! You act like you know what’s about to happen.

HULI JING [crawling into Jinggu’s lap]
It’s not much fun, you know, hearing what other people think before they can even get the words out of their mouths. [To the writhing bodies pressed up to the screen.] Go away, do you hear? That’s quite enough!

9-TAILED FOX #2
You’re lost, Huli Jing! You’ve lost!

JINGGU
What have you lost?

9-TAILED FOX #3
Huli Jing has lost the bet! The mortal is holding you in her arms, Huli Jing, but she’s watching us. She’s kissing you, but she’s listening to us. The mortal will deceive you.

HULI JING
What nonsense! Don’t you know how mortals like to declare their love through 3rd person? Anyone can sing songs, but all that makes are fools into poets. That’s all you are: a poet, idiot!

9-TAILED FOX #4
You think mortal love will transform you? It’s not what lays between her legs, foolish pup. It’s her liver and you know it!

HULI JING
Jinggu will save me! Now go away.

9-TAILED FOX #1
We can tell your aunt, then, can’t we? That the pact still holds!

JINGGU
What pact?

HULI JING [ignoring Jinggu]
Yes, you can! I’m done with bitterness and self-hatred! Tell my aunt and then tell all the salamanders and snakes and tree moss and frogs! Tell the whole world, for all I care!

9-TAILED FOX #3
You will never become mortal, little pup! Not like that.

JINGGU
What are they talking about?

HULI JING
Go on! Go and tell my aunt, I dare you!

9-TAILED FOX #4
She’ll know in a minute. You know what will happen once she knows.

HULI JING
I don’t care if she knows! Tell her that I hate her. I hate this world where I’m always alone and can’t be happy.

[All the 9-Tailed Foxes disappears.]

HULI JING [pulling Jinggu’s face close as if to kiss]
You won’t abandon me, will you Jinggu? There has to be a better way than what the pact says. Help me find it, darling and damn anyone who tries to get in the way.

[End of Act III]

][][

notes:

The humor that I find with Jinggu is that she’s completely oblivious that Huli Jing is, in fact, an immortal spirit. Chinese mythology says that the fox is a shape-shifter, able to transform itself into beautiful forms in order to seduce unwary morals. The reason foxes do this are varied, but often it’s done so that they can become human themselves. When the fox is the hero in the story this is accomplished simply by having the mortal fall in love with it. When the fox is the villain then it needs to eat 100 livers to become human.

Actually there are numerous types of Chinese fox spirits; the huli jing (狐狸精), huxian (狐仙or fox immortal) and the jiuweihu (九尾狐 9-tailed fox). Huli Jing thus becomes a proper name and a noun, much like how Giraudoux used the word ondine for the heroine of his story as well as the race that she comes from.

As to how a 9-tailed fox-spirit might look up on stage that is open to debate. In doing research I’ve found that many manga artists simply draw fox-spirits as busty, half-naked women poised seductively in front of what appears to be a huge pea-cock fan of their fox tails, each one as long as the character’s own body. Not only does it look ridiculous but it begs the question of how anyone, immortal or mortal, could move quickly while carrying such a burden. “Quick as a fox” this ain’t. In Janáček’s opera, The Cunning Little Vixen, the soprano wears fox-like make-up and a rather unflattering fur bodysuit. Perhaps there is a happy medium, somewhere, of the two styles.