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memories of my ghost sista

~ the dead are never satisfied

memories of my ghost sista

Category Archives: self-portrait

Quote

quote unquote

31 Friday Jul 2015

Posted by babylon crashing in quote unquote, self-portrait

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anxeity, quote unquote, the best intentions like string seem to get tangled rather often

please don’t make it weird …

the mantra I repeat to myself every time I have to reply to a letter

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self-portrait [nude]

13 Wednesday May 2015

Posted by babylon crashing in quote unquote, self-portrait

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just a blank wall, no bar, no window, poem, Poetry, reblog

ghostsista:

In the photograph, I stand
naked, my back to the camera,
peering in through the window
of the bar at the the older
women, their gaze direct and
unafraid, the ones who’ve been
to the gym, their breasts more
muscle than fat, thick, butch
waists, their arms massive, thighs
with sinews bigger than my
head; but no, there is no bar,
no window, just a blank wall
and me, standing naked.

Quote

quote unquote

27 Monday Apr 2015

Posted by babylon crashing in Erotic, quote unquote, self-portrait

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mondo perverso, quote unquote, vulgar tongue

i am all vulgar tongue mondo perverso

Quote

quote unquote

14 Tuesday Apr 2015

Posted by babylon crashing in quote unquote, self-portrait

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1902, all I ask, John Masefield, Poetry, quote unquote, sea fever

All I ask is a tall ship and a star to steer her by.

John Masefield, “Sea-Fever“ (1902)

Quote

quote unquote

13 Monday Apr 2015

Posted by babylon crashing in quote unquote, self-portrait

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Coos Bay, fate, Hart Crane, Li Po, poets who've drowned, shadow in the waves, spirit shark

This dream … I dream of this every
single night, being washed over the side of a ship and having the
goddess of the waves, a shadow from the deep masquerading in the skin
of a great white shark, swallow me whole … for the last ten years
when I dream. If I dream. I wrote this for my master’s thesis:

Of the three – Hart Crane,

Li Po and me – Li died

moon viewing in the dark.

Crane drowned at 3

and I was eaten by a shark

– or so they’ll say.

It was true in 2003 when I was in Coos
Bay, Oregon; I saw a shadow in the waves. Even now I can hear her
calling for me. I am a coward for living on dry land. Then I laugh
because don’t we all try to run away from our fate? Ai, fate.

of the three

09 Thursday May 2013

Posted by babylon crashing in self-portrait

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this terrible fate

of the three

This dream … I dream of this every single night, being washed over the side of a ship and having the goddess of the waves, a shadow from the deep masquerading in the skin of great white shark, swallow me whole … for the last ten years when I dream. If I dream. I wrote this for my master’s thesis:

Of the three – Hart Crane,
Li Po and me – Li died
moon viewing in the dark.
Crane drowned at 3
and I was eaten by a shark
– or so they say.

It was true in 2003 when I was in Coos Bay, Oregon and saw a shadow in the waves. Even now I can hear her calling for me. I am a coward for living on dry land. Then I laugh because don’t we all try to run away from our fate? Ai, fate.

Image

the cats in my life

30 Saturday Mar 2013

Tags

cats, life is good, photo

March 30, 2013 (5)

March 30, 2013 (6)

March 30, 2013 (7)

March 30, 2013 (8)

March 30, 2013 (9)

March 30, 2013 (10)

March 30, 2013 (11)

March 30, 2013 (12)

March 30, 2013 (13)

March 30, 2013 (14)

March 30, 2013 (15)

March 30, 2013 (16)

March 30, 2013 (17)

* * *

The sister-brother duo of little Haiku and big, clumsy JR, plus my elderly lady, Ma Cat, who will try to make a nest out of anything she can find. It’s good to have family.

Posted by babylon crashing | Filed under Illustration and art, photograph, self-portrait

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that’s enough for me

15 Friday Feb 2013

Posted by babylon crashing in Illustration and art, Poetry, self-portrait, sonnet

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Aladdin Sane, Gravesend, homoerotica, memory, Putney, redheaded witch, self-portrait, She Who Cannot Be Named, sonnet, winter

putney in wintertime.

putney in wintertime.

London and a diet of shrimp curry,
Southern Comfort, hashish; I can recall
my poor hip pressed up against your icy

wall. We spooned all “winta.” Your Gravesend drawl
made me giggle. We loved Aladdin Sane.

I won’t list faults. Complaining kinda blows.

Why should I complain about love? Complain
it did not work? As if no beasts, heroes,
singers or thinkers ever once fucked up.

We don’t talk about redheaded witchcraft
or She Who Cannot Be Named. Talk is cheap.

Betrayal poems cheaper. I’m grown up.
You’re dead … so what? Once you told me you laughed
with joy as I lay in your arms, asleep.

in illness came a void at the foot of my bed

26 Saturday Jan 2013

Posted by babylon crashing in Illustration and art, Poetry, self-portrait, sonnet

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death, Rumi, self-portrait, sleep, sonnet, wayfaring

wayfaring

“Today, like every other day, we wake up empty
and frightened”
— translators John Moyne & Coleman Barks

Last night I was ill again, the fever
that comes and goes, the blood cough, the bone itch.
No one came to visit. Not in my bed
and not in my dreams. Empty. Blank. A night
like that terrifies me. A void, despite
everything I know about dreams, the dead,
and the veil. It was as if a light switch
had been thrown. The silence was a torture.
I have never questioned the dead, they claimed
to know what they were doing. Plus, so what?
We the living always claim to know death
inside and out. We want death to be tamed;
we want our dead lovers as living smut;
our nights as orgies filling our last breath.

a boy and his green cat

29 Thursday Nov 2012

Posted by babylon crashing in Illustration and art, self-portrait

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green cat, Ma Cat, self-portrait

a boy and his green cat

a boy and his green cat

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